Rogue Ales’ Santa’s Private Reserve Ave & Rare Exports

Happy New Year, Drinkers!

Now that the holidays are over, I thought it would be an appropriate time to post a Christmas-themed pairing. Because I plan ahead! Today, we’re sipping on Rogue’s Santa’s Private Reserve while watching the Finnish (of Finland) film Rare Exports. This pairing was a little weird, a little late, a little disappointing and very confusing, which seemed like an accurate summation of many people’s holiday. So let’s get it started!

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For a quick summary, Rare Exports is a 2010 film about how an evil Santa Claus is thawed out from a Finnish mountain and wreaks havoc on a small town. Or at least that’s what the movie was billed as. But instead of the Santa-slasher that I was expecting, I was treated to a relatively bloodless, thrill-less story of a weird boy,  his weird knowledge of evil Santa and the naked, pickaxe-wielding men who come after him. Still sound exciting? Well then continue to be disappointed. Almost nothing happens in the movie. The story plods along without suspense, tension or intrigue, dragged along by largely boring, one-dimensional characters. Our pack of protagonists is lead by a very strange and annoying young boy named Pietari who demands his father beat him so Santa doesn’t claim him as a ‘naught boy.’ Really it’s just scene after scene of disappointment. With such a great (re. terrible) premise, it’s frustrating to see it thrown away on a piece that takes itself too seriously yet lacks the narrative tools to do so.

This implies more drama than actually exists in this film

This implies more drama than actually exists in this film

So maybe our beer helped fight off the winter chill from Rare Exports? Well, yes and no. Rogue’s Santa’s Private Reserve Ale is an Imperial Red (hence Santa, I suppose) but it lacks any sort of winter-y profile. Which is fine, if you’re not expecting a winter beer. The beer pours an copper-red color with a sizable, foamy white head. Mixed with the distinct Red hoppiness is a little caramel-sweetness balanced against a medium body. On its own, it’s a solid beer. It’s simple, not overwhelmingly bitter or piney and is easy to drink. But if you’re looking for a specifically winter-y beer, maybe this isn’t the brew for you.

So there you have it, Drinkers! Another holiday gone by, another pairing behind us. Unfortunately, I was a bit disappointed with the movie. And the beer, while solid, was not what I was expecting. But if that’s the extent of my displeasure, then I think we did just fine. Thanks for reading and I hope you had a wonderful New Years holiday!

And as always keep drinking, my friends!
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Tonight’s Tasting Notes:
Rogue’s Santa’s Private Reserve:
-Lovely red pour
-Well balanced flavors & body
-Not a winter beer, despite the name

Rare Exports:
-Unfortunately underwhelming
-Very little actually happens
-Simple, one-dimensional characters

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2 Comments

Filed under Review

2 responses to “Rogue Ales’ Santa’s Private Reserve Ave & Rare Exports

  1. I review the Bruery’s Christmas release every year and this year (as always) I’m not going to get to it until Mid-January. So cheers to planning!

    I’ve had several people say they were disappointed in Santa’s (really! “Santa’s” is not in Firefox’s spell check system – heathens) reserve, I didn’t have it this year and don’t see an reason to seek it out now. But I’ll be looking for it next year.

    That’s a shame about the movie. It’s a shame when an deliciously bad idea (naked, evil Santa thawed from ice and wrecks havoc on unsuspecting populace) gets wasted.

    Happy New year!

    • Yeah with a market saturated with great winter/Christmas beers, I think you can skip this one. My go-to’s are Sierra Nevada’s Celebration and Anchor Brewing’s Merry Christmas/Happy New Year Ale.

      And yes, I was very disappointed. As a lover and connoisseur of terrible films, I think this one was a missed opportunity. Oh well.

      Happy New Year to you too and thanks for reading!

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